5 March 2010
Baby Rock
Filed under music
A couple of years ago, Reid and Larrilynn were expecting their first kid, and Don planned a baby shower for Reid’s friends, which brings up something else I need to rant about, but not tonight. Let’s just say I was opposed to the entire concept but of course I’m not going to miss a thing like that on principle. There are things you just go to because you’re people’s friend, and principles be darned.
The shower was at one of those all-the-way-upstairs-at-Ala-Moana Japanese buffet places, the kind of place where if we had the shower there now, I’d have had to make an excuse and missed out, because it’s just out of my price range now. The food was good and yes, there were embarrassing baby-shower games and at first I was going to be too cool for that, but then I reminded myself that I wasn’t there for me, so I went all out in all three games. Of course, the first two games were pencil-and-paper word games, and although I am not invincible in games like that, I can say without boasting that with that group of friends, I’m not very likely to lose. Sorry, guys.
The third game involved racing everyone else to finish a baby bottle filled with apple juice. I came in second to the woman who would later become Todd’s wife. I wanted to call foul because the sight of her sucking so aggressively on that nipple was an unfair distraction—she was sitting directly across the table from me, for crying out loud, and all of Todd’s girlfriends have been cuties.
I put a lot of thought into the gift I gave, and I went somewhat over my budget. I gave R and L a CD of nature sounds. I think it was a forest with a nearby stream. That, and a Cars greatest hits CD, which is what put me over-budget. It was a lot more expensive than I expected.
I hesitated before buying. Looked all over the store for something else that I thought would serve as well, but no. What rock and roll band (except maybe, as I was reminded of this evening by @windwardskies and @champuru, They Might Be Giants) would be more interesting, more fun, and less inappropriate than the best songs from the Cars? If you want your kid to have a solid rock and roll background from a very early age, I suggest that you really couldn’t do much better than the Cars. Sure, you’d want to augment that with some Beach Boys and Beatles, probably, eventually, but for those first critical months of early consciousness development, I think the best pick is the Cars.
What a waste. First of all, Reid and Larrilynn’s tastes don’t even lean in the direction of rock and roll. Second, I don’t think they even considered for a moment the possibility of exposing their child to this music at that age. Which is their call, of course, and I respect that. It all really goes to show you one thing: I have no business at a baby shower, and the world is a better place if it keeps that in mind!
2010-03-05 :: me