Zones of proximal development

Crazy busy at work these last two weeks. Like, can you get this done today kind of busy. In the plus column: the days are moving quickly. In the minus column: January, my favorite month, has flown without me and I never really got to enjoy it as I usually do.

Also in the minus column: either the busy-ness is causing me to sleep poorly or it’s coinciding with my sleeping poorly. Either way I’m physically, emotionally, tenuously hanging on.

I’ve decided, perhaps arbitrarily and perhaps out of survival’s necessity, that the movie with Crush Girl was by far most likely just a friend thing. I will take it. I would so much rather have her as a movie-going just-a-friend than not, even if it breaks my heart from time to time. A rock feels no pain, and an island never cries.

This lyric is probably not applicable or relevant, but it seemed like a good place for it.

One of my friends is moving to the East Coast and it’s a little bit of a bummer, even though I suspect we’re both better off not living so close to one another. I liked having a buddy who shares my birthday, even if we never celebrated it together. She’s a twin, so while I have never shared my birthday with anyone, she’s shared hers with someone her entire life. Not a big deal at all.

I think we’re better off because we are either getting along famously or we’re not getting along at all. It’s maybe the most tempestuous friendship I’ve ever had, and I am just not equipped for it. Because I dislike confrontation, I deal with these weird periods of taking up arms by simply withdrawing. It’s depressing. It would make being friends with her completely not worth it if it weren’t so good when we are getting along.

I’m sad to see her go, and she’s sad to be leaving. I really don’t think she’s going to be better off all the way over there, but one does what one must. Still, a long-distance friendship may work best for us. Here’s hoping.

Too tired for the Friday 5. I’ll get to it this weekend.