Lockdown: A break in the logjam

The feel-good from defeating the Monster early Tuesday bled into my most productive day Wednesday at work in more than a week. I think it didn’t carry over into the rest of Tuesday because I was still recovering, so the momentum skipped a day, if such a thing is possible.

I sigh a sigh of relief. It’s not that I thought my mojo was gone for good — it was too plain that I was feeling crappy all twenty-four hours of my days, not merely the nine or ten each day I spend supposedly being a writer for a nonprofit.

But I had things to complete. People whose tasks were on pause while they waited for me. People including my supervisor who just signed a lovely annual review of my performance. People who are trying to deal with some of their best, most reliable reports being cut loose on Bloody Wednesday. It weighed.

I struggled to complete this donor story I was more than a week late with. Had to do a little deep-Google to find a twenty-year-old Star-Bulletin article that helped me reframe my story. It broke everything loose for me. Turned it in mid-day.

I have another story I’m behind on, but also had in queue a proposal that someone wanted “sooner rather than later,” which of course is only a hair clearer than “ASAP,” but this one came to me already written (!) by someone in the department. Which is how this whole proposal structure was originally put forth. The researchers do the work with some organizational guidance from me. Then I put it in a nice template and edit the language so it’s readable and pretty.

This one was organized so well I didn’t move a thing. Just dropped it in the template and edited a bit for readability, then brought in a few photos I got from some coworkers. Utterly painless. A first! And it looks good.

Thursday morning I have a three-hour development training via Zoom. I was terrified about this until I found out the entire development staff (and then some) plus a few others (like me) are in this, more than two-thirds of the company. So I’ll most likely be able to Zoom in with out my being in video, making it easier to squirm in my uncomfortable desk chair and scratch my forehead without looking like a doofus in front of everyone. We’ll all be muted, of course, so that makes it even easier.

I can’t say I’m looking forward to it, but I know I have a lot to learn and I’m here to learn it. Even in pedagogically questionable ways on less-than-ideal platforms. I shouldn’t rip anyone’s pedagogy before I’ve seen it. It’s the concept of teaching something useful in this format that gets me, but what choices have any of us got?

Also, it starts at nine, when I usually don’t get to my desk until half an hour later.

Thankfully, my afternoon Zoom for brainstorming an annual report thing is called off.


I signed out at about 6:15 after sending off that proposal, then got right to work getting ready for bed. Loaded up the empty water jugs, brushed my teeth, packed my laundry stuff, and went to bed at around eight. Got up at 2:30 to come to the laundry, which is where I am now.

Breakfast was a bowl of Honey Bunches of Oats (not the store brand for a change). Lunch was a bowl of pasta. I used a jarred sauce and added red pepper flakes, dried garlic flakes, and brown sugar. This has been my preferred preparation lately for some reason. No wine since I didn’t have an already opened bottle this time. Stirred in some gorgonzola but could have used more. Dang it. It was yummy anyway.

Dinner, which I am consuming now, is a Big Mac combo from McD’s.

Ryan and I traded a mess of texts about Hawaii Stories, then took it to FB messenger to include one of our Hilo friends. JB and I texted briefly about War and Peace and Moby-Dick. Crush Girl texted to ask how I’m doing, and I told her honestly that it’s been a rough week. I asked about her weekend, and she told me a few nice things about it that really made me feel good. It was nice to hear about her having a good weekend, since mine was so lousy. I admit it was also nice because there was a little bit of personal disclosure from someone who’s not always eager to give it out.

Sent the loanable Kindle books list to a few more people via text. Texted Sharon to ask if she’s spending less money since the lockdown began (I’m spending more lately than I was several weeks ago, but I’m still coming out ahead every two weeks, which is why I wondered). Julie texted to talk more about the Taylor Swift album.

Didn’t go for a walk because laundry. May hit the beach on my way home.

Two loads of laundry tumble in their duplex of dryers. The nation stumbles deeper into death and disease. The elected leader bumbles his way through interviews and press briefings. We the People fumble toward the possible ecstacy of November relief. Let it please not be too late, O God.

Reach out. I’ve got bandwidth if you’ve got connectivity issues.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.